Relationships are difficult, and it is rare to never have problem. And many individuals end up in hard places where they are unable to see this unhealthy thing is ultimately the relationship. Denial can cause us to disregard indications that warn us while making sure we stay trapped in an unfulfilling reality. So, if you wonder whether you are being delusional when it comes to your relationship, here are 5 signs to look out for.
1. You Feel Constantly Lonely
If you feel lonely while being single, it is understandable; such feelings are bitter but can be managed, yet if you feel isolated while in a relationship, that marks a huge red flag. You should in your relationships feel companioned, connected to and supported. If you believe that your partner is emotionally unavailable or that they are not by your side for you at the time of need then, it could be a time, to get deep insight into what is going on.
And the feeling of constant being lonely is always a sign that you and your partner have lost interest in each other. Your partner may tend to be self-absorbed all the time OR conversations are less deep in nature. If you seem to deny this aloneness more in the sense of disconnection from others, then there is a chance that it will leave your mind weak and even feel incomplete over a while.
An attempt to solve this problem is you started being real with yourself about what the hell is going on. Do you fear admitting that something is wrong? Doing so allows you to confront your emotions, determining whether or not your partner can offer the companionship and support that you need.
2. You Make Excuses for Your Partner’s Insensitive Behavior
We want to believe the best about the person we are with, but seeking understanding is not the same as turning a blind eye to behavior that simply hurts. If you partner regularly says or does something that upsets you; and you keep making excuses for it whether to yourself or anyone else you could be in denial.
Insensitive comments can be characterized as minimizing your emotions, invalidating your needs and making disparaging remarks. You may excuse them by saying they were just “stressed” or that they clearly did not mean it, but the truth is that when there is damage done repeatedly, you have to at least admit the harm it’s causing you.
If you see this pattern in your own life, explore why are you making excuses for their behavior. Many are in denial because they fear confrontation or are concerned about losing the relationship. Put your emotional health first, Seek professional help with a disagreement to determine whether the relationship is really good for you.
3. You Don’t Have Affection or Sex
Another major part of most romantic relationships (certainly all the successful ones) is physical intimacy, which usually indicates something about the level of emotional connection between partners. Once you realize that there are fewer times of tell about beauty and luxury with your partner, or if much time has passed since the last good intimacy, these behaviors can signal some problems.
Absence of physical intimacy inevitably gives rise to rejection and loneliness. When other intimacy issues become a problem in this manner, many folks in that boat tend to convince themselves it can not last eternally or it is just a phase or things will get better eventually are rooted probably you need to elevate the relationship deeper from there.
Maybe talk to your partner about how you are feeling. A refusal to discuss the web of issues could indicate that they are also in denial about how bad things really are. Direct talks are essential, as is going to a specialist for help if there is an incapacity around closeness. Find out more about accessing professional support here All in the Family Counselling.
4. You’re Constantly Complaining to Your Friends About Your Relationship
In a healthy relationship, you feel overall satisfied and your grievances are few. However, if you are over-sharing what feels like petty frustrations often to your friends it could suggest that you are not coming to terms with deeper issues. If you complain a lot, then going on about your frustrations verbally can be a way to excuse yourself from taking action due to the fact you are letting it all out.
If you see this in your own life, perhaps its time to step back and take stock of why we are so darn unhappy. Rather than keep using your friends as a sounding board, write down the complaints and see if there is any common thread. This exercise might be able to give you clarity, as well help you in identifying if the relationship has some real issues that need to be resolved.
Therapists can also give you an outsider’s point of view about your relationship. Therapy can help you see if you’re avoiding some truths about the situation and give you tools to address them. Find out more about therapy choices here All in the Family Counselling.
5. You’re Crying Alone About the Relationship
One of the clearest indicators that you are in denial about your relationship is if you find yourself weeping alone over what is happening between you! When you have an emotional outburst like this, it usually means that you are carrying some big pain or frustration and it is being heavy on your mental and emotional health.
There are many problems this can create, it could go anywhere from struggling to feel loved and supported (yes even while hugs are existent) to going through bitterness. And sure, part of your mind is just going to say that these things are common: ‘things will get better,’ this is what happens one is facing a struggle but if the teariness persists day after day and week after week, it indicates personal problems have been ignored.
But the act of admitting to yourself why this is happening can be so freeing. You do not have to go through these feelings alone. Having friends, family members or a therapist who is there for you can offer the guidance to show you when you might not be letting go of something that is no longer serving you.
Why Facing Relationship Issues Can Be Difficult
Denial comes from our desire to not experience the pain associated with the realization that the relationship we were in may be everything but what we wished for. Perhaps, we are scared of being alone, the financial or social hit of a break-up or just dislike of change. But refusing to believe it and ignoring what someone has done costs each of us our own peace, and takes away from how soon we can find happiness again.
A therapist will assist you in working through these confusing feelings, helping to process the truth of what your relationship looks like. Going to therapy does not mean that your relationship has failed therapists help you decide on the direction of your future with informed perspective.
Conclusion: Be Honest with Yourself and Move On
Having awareness of these things and facing the truth of where you stand in your relationship is one big step towards creating a life that feels wholesome and okay to be in. Recognising how you feel, knowing what it is you are looking for and maybe getting professional help can all lead to ensuring that the decisions you make put your mental health first.
If you are ready to learn how therapy can help you through these issues, contact a professional who can provide you with the tools and strategies necessary. If you do not have this support or news during healing from your divorce, therapy is an amazing resource to discover the truth about your relationship and help bring yourself towards compassion and clarity.
